Me the VIP

The envelope saluted me as a VIP and contained a "cordial invitation" to Hollywood Park's handicapping championship June 28-29. Immediately, I was suspicious. In the spirit of Groucho Marx, I won't get involved with any group whose standards are so low that it wants me to join.

The top 10 finishers will receive a spot in the 2009 Daily Racing Form/NTRA National Handicapping Championship in Las Vegas, and the first three in Hollywood's Gold Cup Handicapping Challenge will get $50,000, $10,000 and $5,000. There are plenty of perks, too -- a cocktail party the night before, free valet parking and buffet, free admission, programs and Racing Forms and special VIP room rates. Then came the catch. The buy-in to the "real money" tournament is . . . $7,500, which kind of priced me out. I could handle losing that much over five years or so, but traveling across the continent to risk seven large in two days would not be fun or relaxing. I enjoy playing $80 no-limit hold 'em tournaments, but I'd never consider ponying up 10 grand for the World Series of Poker.

Yet if you're interested in risking big bucks in late June in Hollywood's Sunset Room, contact George Ortuzar (georgeo@hollywoodpark.com) or Tonya Brown (tonyab@hollywoodpark.com). And be sure to mention my name, because that and $7,500 will get you in the door.